How to Know if You’re Falling for Someone

Introduction

Liking someone can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. Sometimes, it’s hard to figure out whether you actually have feelings for a person or if it’s just a fleeting interest. By reading the following sections, you can determine whether you might be falling for someone.

Step 1: Understanding What It Means to Like Someone

Know What “Liking” Means.

The Urban Dictionary defines “liking” someone as a “strong desire to be with a person you find extremely attractive and special.” Liking someone can make you feel a whirlwind of emotions—like being incredibly shy and at the same time, unable to stop thinking about them. While you can’t choose who you like, once you realize your feelings, you can decide how to act on them.

Recognize the Different Types of Liking.

The term “like” is used in many contexts. It can refer to a temporary crush or a deep romantic interest.

Friendly Liking: It’s important to remember that not all strong feelings are romantic. Developing trust and closeness with someone doesn’t necessarily mean you have romantic feelings for them, and that’s perfectly okay. Wanting to spend time with a person could simply mean you’re becoming best friends. Friendly affection is normal—you should want to be around your best friend.
Admiration: Sometimes, you may feel strong emotions toward someone you look up to, like a celebrity, teacher, or a classmate who did something impressive. This admiration might be mistaken for romantic feelings because of its intensity. If you find yourself in awe of someone who’s achieved something great or can teach you a lot, it’s normal. Try not to overthink it—just let time pass, and you’ll often find that once the initial awe fades, the feelings do too.
Infatuation: Being attracted to another person is human nature. Even if you’re in a perfect relationship, you might still find others attractive. This is known as infatuation—it’s usually short-lived and often fueled by physical attraction. If you’re single, it might be worth exploring; if you’re in a relationship, remember that it doesn’t necessarily mean you need to reconsider your current relationship.
Romantic Liking: Sometimes, liking someone truly means that you have a deep, romantic interest in them. Romantic liking means you want to be more than friends; you want to be their partner. If you find yourself imagining holding hands, kissing, or hugging this person, you might be falling for them.

Evaluate the Intensity of Your Feelings.

Understanding the level of your feelings will help you decide how to proceed—whether to keep your feelings to yourself or to confess them to the person you like. The following sections will help you gauge just how strong your feelings are.

Step 2: Observing Your Behavior Around the Person You Like

Reflect on Your Behavior When They’re Around.

Pay attention to your body language and how you instinctively react when the person you like is nearby. People show their feelings in different ways, often subconsciously. Generally, when you like someone, you’ll exhibit one of two behaviors—either you become very shy and stumble over your words, or you become very outgoing.

Shy Reaction: Do you suddenly want to curl up into a ball when they’re around? Do you blush and find the floor’s dust spots suddenly fascinating? Do you feel like you have nothing witty to say? These are all signs that you might be falling for this person.
Outgoing Reaction: Do you suddenly feel an urge to tease the person you might like? Do you talk more when they’re around because you want to get their attention? These are also signs of liking someone. Just be careful not to make the person uncomfortable—tease lightly, or they might not want to hang out with you.
Flirtatious Behavior: Do you want the person you like to notice your outfit or hairstyle that day? Do you find yourself smiling a lot and making jokes? Or do you suddenly want to dress up more, hoping they’ll notice you? Tossing your hair, playing with your clothes, and making eye contact are all signs you like someone.

Think About How You Feel When They’re Nearby.

One of the most common signs of liking someone is feeling like a million butterflies are dancing in your stomach when they’re around. Or maybe your heart skips a beat when you see them, and you feel warm and dizzy.

Do you suddenly feel both nervous and excited? You might want to hug them or just be close to them. These are all normal reactions to liking someone.
Do you feel like you’d give up anything to be near this person?

Notice How You Act Around Friends vs. the Person You Like.

Liking someone can make you either want to be the center of attention or avoid speaking entirely when they’re around. If you’re chatting with a group of friends and the person you like walks by, how do you react?

Do you suddenly feel the need to be the focus? You might start a conversation about something cool you did just to get their attention, or maybe you’ll start talking to a friend in a way that they’ll hear. You might try to interact with the person as much as possible to keep their attention on you.
Do you suddenly become tongue-tied? Liking someone can sometimes make you feel so awkward that you don’t know what to say. If you’re usually talkative but suddenly fall silent when that special person is around, you probably like them.
Do you feel like your friends disappear when the person you like is nearby? Even if you’re surrounded by people, you might find that your focus shifts entirely to the one you like. You might laugh more than usual, even if the jokes aren’t that funny, and struggle to focus on anything else when they’re around. These are all signs that you’re falling for someone.

Pay Attention to How Much You Care About Your Appearance.

One of the main signs of liking someone is wanting to impress them. Do you spend more time getting ready in the morning? Have you bought new clothes because you think they’d like them? Do you spend extra time fixing your hair or makeup, just in case you run into them? If so, you’re likely falling for this person.

Step 3: When You’re Not Around the Person You Like

Consider Whether You Think About Them Constantly.

If you find yourself putting that special person ahead of everything else and can’t stop thinking about them, there’s a good chance you like them.

You might be having dinner with your family, but you’re not really paying attention because you’re wondering what they’re doing right now.
You might be hanging out with friends, but deep down, you wish you were with the person you like.
When it’s time for bed, do you find yourself wondering what it would be like to say goodnight to them?

Notice How Often You Talk About Them.

Do you find yourself constantly bringing them up in conversation with friends? One of the key signs of liking someone is when your friends tell you that you mention this person a lot. If you feel comfortable, it might help to confide in your best friend about your feelings. They can help you figure out whether it’s just a crush or something more.

Be careful who you share this with. Don’t just tell anyone that you like someone, as it might get back to them and cause awkwardness. Only tell your closest, most trusted friends.

Think About Whether You’ve Changed Any of Your Habits for Them.

Have you made any changes to your daily routine or lifestyle to get their attention?

Do you walk past their locker repeatedly just to catch a glimpse of them?
Have you changed your route to class because you know they take the same path?
Have you developed a new interest in something just because they like it too, like photography or rock climbing?

Observe How You React When Others Mention Their Name.

A typical reaction to liking someone is feeling excited when their name comes up in conversation. If someone suddenly mentions the person you like, do you:

Feel a rush of excitement? Get butterflies in your stomach? Feel your heart race? Blush and start smiling? Start stammering or get nervous? If any of these things happen, you’re definitely into them.

Pay Attention to Your Daydreams.

There’s a difference between thinking about someone and daydreaming about them. Thinking about someone means you’re curious about what they’re doing or how they’re feeling. Daydreaming involves fantasizing about something happening with that person. People who like someone often daydream about them.

If you find yourself daydreaming about going on adventures with someone, holding hands, kissing, or doing anything romantic, you’re probably falling for them.

Notice Whether Certain Things Remind You of Them.

If a song, movie, or book reminds you of someone, it’s a clear sign that you like them.

If you listen to a love song and think, “Oh, that’s exactly how I feel!” you’re definitely into someone.
If you watch a movie like Titanic and imagine yourself and the person you like as Jack and Rose, you’re in deep.
If you read Romeo and Juliet and immediately resonate with the hopeless love between the characters, you’re definitely falling for someone.

Reflect on Why You’re Reading This Article. While reading this article, did someone specific come to mind? If the answer is yes, then you’re likely already developing feelings for them.